"Open up and say AAaaaAhhHhh!!!~!~"

It’s that time of year again, and Christmas is just around the corner which symbolizes the biggest shopping day of the year. YEaaaaaaaaaaa baaaaaaaaaaa. For decades, human being has been spending hundreds, thousands or even millions on Christmas shopping season. So, how was mine? Pretty damm good for someone who could have a lot to be not thankful for. I’m not going to dwell on all that though because I’m broke and not gonna buy expensive present this year and I’m generally the type that complain too much.

Blurry-eyed from insomnia, dedicated shoppers leave the comfort and warmth of their bed and home to brave the pre-dawn cold in hope of arriving close enough to the front of the line to take advantage of doorbuster deals of extremely limited in quantity merchandise. A day off work has been booked, and you have set your date for Christmas shopping. As you prepare yourself, you make a mental map of the shops you will visit and the best place to park the car. Humming your favourite carol you set out on your venture. Then the Christmas imps call in the gremlins and you are faced with "knn, what to buy?". As for me this year, it's not "what to buy", it's "how much?"- I'm freaking poor for now.

It doesn't really matter what you buy, the wrapping is more important. Buy a soap or a condom and wrap em up in a box with newspaper. Wrap em over and over with newspaper, say like ermm.... 40 layers of newspaper - the more layer the more impressive it'll look. When you are done, wrap the last layer with a beautifully look wrapper and hook it up with a Christmas card.
And whose idea is this? I don't know, I got this Christmas present a couple of years ago. I got a fuxing soap wrapped with like more than 50 layers of newspaper and I was so happy at first that the present was so BIG !

Come to think about Christmas shopping, damm I hate it for some reasons. Your parcels are always twice as heavy and bulky than you expected, there is always some morons ahead of you in the queue who is paying with a combination of gift vouchers and couple of cents, the toddler in the pushchair behind you will throw its bottle and catch you just behind your knees, there will always be a small child spreadeagled on the floor in exhaustion or mid-tantrum. Fux all these, I'm going to prepare my Christmas present list now.