"Open up and say AAaaaAhhHhh!!!~!~"

What a boring Christmas! No party, no gifts, no where to go, no one to go out with, nothing to play, nothing to do. I'm sitting here in front of my dektop at this unholy hour. I was here yesterday at this time as well. And, I'm sure I'll be here tomorrow. And, what am I doing? NOTHING! Been waiting for someone's reply but no news for hours, there are nothing much to do and just too many problems to settle which I am lazy enough to do anything about it.

My life is boring. Christmas just seems like another pent-up day that will hold nothing but small annoyances and too much arguments. I think I am fuxed up. Sometimes I ask myself whether I am still myself or if I have become an entirely different person. Am I still the one I used to be, with all my egos and confidence? The answer is I don't know. I really don't know. Although some things have changed. I used to love loneliness, to be completely alone. It made me somewhat happy. Although I still love the rare lonely moments in my life but hey come on, who doesn't want the companionship of the girl they love.

I still think that my life doesn't make much sense except for fuxing things up and being a real asshole. But on the other hand, I see a lot of my friends they have someone to love, someone they can really trust in, someone who doesn't want them to wear their daily life mask, someone they trust so much that they can be sure she will take care of their heart even if they are sick to death, someone who does not love their masks but their true inner self. Damn, that's one hell of a huge difference with my life.

I have become someone else. I have been obsessed by something. I can feel the presence of the evil, all the anger and all the chaotic anarchism raging inside my head, as strong as it has ever been. I have become so unpredictable. Ok fux this, think I'm a little drunk. Just had 5 cans of beers.

Anyway, wish everyone a merry Christmas and enjoy your holidays. And don't drink too much ( *gulp gulp gulp* ), yah don't drink too much *burrrrrRRrp*.

Fux this, what a senseless post!